On Losing One’s Job

You were a straight A student. You did your best to earn a scholarship and get into that prestigious institution of higher learning. You worked harder to graduate with flying colors. All your effort paid off because, in the end, you get that “corporate” job you have always dreamt about. Then, the unexpected happens, you get fired from your job. What are you supposed to do?

“Life is not fair” is the first lesson you learn from getting fired unexpectedly. You may have been the best student, the envy of your contemporaries, the most promising graduate of a prestigious university, but you are not spared from “job cuts” enforced by the ‘powers-that-be’. When you think that life is never fair, you have this level of acceptance of your predicament that will not cause you extreme anxiety or mental breakdown. Bearing in mind that life is never fair becomes a defense mechanism in that it shields you from further mental exhaustion. It is stressful enough to think that losing your job means you will not be able to pay your rent, your bills, your insurance, et cetera. It will even be more exhausting to keep asking yourself all the ‘whys.’ So, embark on the next journey by heeding to Oscar Wilde’s words and taking note of the second clause: “Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it is.”

“Less is more” is another lesson you will learn from a job loss. After college, you want to pursue the “good life”. You leave the old, boring, provincial town to find a corporate job in bigger, more sophisticated world of the city. You rent an apartment, buy your car, pay your own bills and relish your independence. As a young professional, you are conscious about your physical and mental health, and you exhaust all the possible avenues in the city to stay fit and healthy. You go the gym, subscribe to health magazines, learn a new language, practice yoga, and the like. And you continue dreaming of a more ‘fulfilling’ life by embarking on traveling the world. So you start listing those touristy places you plan on visiting. All these dreams of self-improvement, independence, and travel depended on your having a job.

Losing your source of income means reevaluating all your plans that involve money. You will have to prioritize your needs over wants. Your bills come first – food, rent, utilities, transportation, phone, internet. You will probably have to stop paying for gym and yoga classes and start running by the park instead. You will probably need to make your own coffee instead of frequenting Starbucks. You will probably just drive to National Parks in your state and cross out those exciting places in the world you have on your bucket list. And when the worst case scenario happens that you can no longer pay your apartment, you might probably need to go back home and live with your parents. Having no source of income means tapping your creativity to adjust and survive.

You are lucky if you are able to find another job right after losing your corporate position. The reality however is that you might not be able to find another corporate job as easily, so be prepared to settle for a non-corporate job if you do not have enough savings for basic necessities. Sometimes, you need to put aside your idealism and ego. When reality requires common sense or pragmatism, you’ve got to heed to it. You would rather have a less ideal job to keep paying your food and phone bill, than to stay idle. Besides, anything to get out of the rut helps you maintain a good mental health. So, get up and find that less ideal job.

“When the going gets tough, the tough gets going,” so goes somebody’s admonition. It is natural to feel upset and even angry when you get cut from your job. Young professionals, for instance, who are still starting their careers are at a stage in life where they want to prove themselves because they know that this is the way to keep one’s job. So, getting terminated especially on an unjustifiable ground causes so much frustration. This frustration can turn into depression if the person does not fight it. “What am I going to do?” you ask. I say, “Do not brood over your loss. Get up and start reconnecting. Think about a few of the people who care about you – a grandmother, a brother, a close friend, a neighbor, etc. Connect with them and do not hesitate to ask for some advice or even financial help. And I understand that our pride sometimes prevents us from asking or receiving help. Toughen up by humbly accepting help from others. You will be surprised at the kindness and generosity of those around you. There will always be a fellow human being willing to ease your pain.

Finally, “Strive to be happy,” says a line in Max Ehrmann’s “Desiderata”. True happiness does not come from having all the material things you need. It does not come from recognition and prestige. It does not come from having a well-paying job. Happiness comes from being content with living a simple life, with having good physical and mental health, with having some connections with nature and fellow human beings. You determine your happiness – your inner peace. So, no matter the circumstances, find that silver lining each day.